Terrible Statues for Your Viewing Pleasure
Nathan Bedford Forrest
There’s something of a hot topic in the USA at the moment on whether or not the statues of the “heroes” of the Confederate forces of the countries Civil War should be removed or not. Personally, I cannot see why you’d honour anyone who fought to keep a race supressed for their own gain should be celebrated but for whatever reason there are people out there that do. Of course, that leaves us with plenty of contenders for the title but seeing as this article is intended to amuse you lets take a look at the Nathan Bedford Forrest statue that sits just by Interstate 65 which runs through Nashville, Tennessee. We can see the man sat atop his rearing horse, gun in hand with confederate flags waving behind him. Efforts have been made to remove it but have been met with no results. The only saving grace then is the fact that the statue itself is so hilariously bad that instead it paints their honouring of the man with an unwitting irony.
From a man that fought to oppress the people to a man that fought to free his, William Wallace is one of histories most well known freedom fighters, and there’s no doubt that he has the popular 1995 movie Braveheart by Mel Gibson to thank for his notoriety. It’s also well known that the film was fraught with historical inaccuracy, so when a statue of the Mel Gibson portrayal was placed up in front of the National Wallace Monument many were not happy about it. The Statue itself stands at 12 feet tall and shows Gibson’s kilt clad hero holding a shield which has “Braveheart” written across it and holding a ball and chain. He stands in an awkwardly stiff pose whilst his mouth lets out a battle cry of freedom, or a lofty high note in a musical number, it’s quite hard to tell to be honest. Eventually attempts to vandalise the statue were made so measures were taken to protect it, you could read it’s stated of “freedom” from behind a cage from then on.
Here is a man known for his sheer arrogance and lack of modesty but even for him this statue is a bit much. John Lennon was once chastised for comparing The Beatles to Jesus in their popularity, Kanye West takes the concept and turns it up to 11 by having a statue of himself as Jesus built. The statue depicts the man in gold standing as if he were crucified wearing nothing but a loin cloth, a crown of thorns, a gold chain and medallion around his neck and a pair of his signature Yeezy’s to top it all off. He stands on a plinth that has the words “False Idol” inscribed on it but even with that statement the thing is still an unbelievable testament to the man’s ego. The only saving grace is that the face of the statues doesn’t look at all like West, though it’s quite possibly what he thinks he looks like.